Usually, when people say that they are going to join a dating site, people assume that it is because they want to hook up with someone or they are interested in finding someone that they could form a relationship with. Rarely do people ever think that if you’re looking for friendship, a dating site is a good option.
Interestingly enough, women looking for friendship will often join a dating site, and they are met with some resistance. However, many people believe that if you want a relationship to work, you need to become friends first. So, it makes complete sense that if you use the friendship-first approach to relationships, that will translate to your online dating endeavors.
How Does Friendship-First Approach Work?
When you join a dating site with the intention of looking for friendship before you delve into anything romantic, you’re more concerned about sharing fun memories and exciting experiences with people. You are interested in getting to know them as a person first. Ideally, shouldn’t all relationships work like that?
It’s NOT the “Friend Zone.”
The very idea of being friend-zoned is based on the expectation that sex is going to be happening at some point of the “friendship.” For those who are mad that they get friend-zoned, then it’s a clear indication that they aren’t interested in you as a person, but only want to get with you for other reasons. In fact, when they complain about being friend-zoned, it’s harmful to relationships, and it can hinder our capacity for healthy friendships and relationships.
Why Does Looking for Friendship First Work?
Looking for friendship before actually getting involved in a relationship with someone isn’t reserved for a select group of people — it’s quickly becoming nationwide phenomena. Crazy right? This works because being friends with someone first can open new doors that we didn’t have before.
Okay, let’s look at it this way. If you’re friends with someone that you met on a dating site, you get to know them. You get to know their interests and hobbies, and they can learn yours. Who knows, you may know someone that can help them advance their career, or help them in other ways. This is different than when you make friends the traditional way because we tend to make friends with people who already have similar interests. Think about it. The last time you made a friend, was it because they already were part of your social circle in some way?
The sobering truth is that one of the main reasons why people even join a free online dating site is because they want to meet someone who has similar interests and hobbies. Yes, you can meet people with your own friends, but chances are you already know them. Online dating gives you the opportunity to meet others that you normally wouldn’t. That is, after all, the point of going online, right? To meet people you normally wouldn’t. Right!